Isabel Marias (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
naturalcure) wrote2016-10-19 01:21 pm
naturalcure) wrote2016-10-19 01:21 pm
[Video Post]
[The recording begins with Isabel practicing at Sakana. Her phone is propped up on a flat surface, recording her. She's up in a tree. With surprising quickness, she drops down, grabbing a branch and swings to another nearby tree, grabbing another branch. She then drops down to the ground and lands on her feet. A hand goes to her chest and she grimaces. She walks over to her phone, picks it up and sits down.]
...I started playing this game about twenty years ago. Six years old. My parents introduced it to me. I wasn't learning to read or write or do math or anything at the pace I should've been, but once I got my hands on these cards...I remember those things started making sense. I played the game all the time with my mom and dad.
[She's silent for a moment. She stares down at nothing.]
Then, they were gone.
And I didn't have anything...'cept a lot of anger and sadness that I couldn't handle, and this game. So I played this game every opportunity I could. I tried to get better as much as possible, because if I was focused on getting better, everything stopped hurting for a little while. Eventually, I got good enough that people started to notice. I could enter tournaments and win, even though I didn't have the best or the rarest card. I thought...maybe I can do better than just getting better. Maybe I can become the best. Maybe I can be like Yugi. Or Kaiba. Maybe I can be a champion.
I skipped meals. I skipped sleep. I skipped school. I rode on trains overnight all over my country to go to tournaments. And it worked. I won. I could get better cards. And I became the youngest duelist to win the French Championship in history. Still am. 13 years old, nobody's broken that yet, after more than ten years. Then, all of a sudden, I wasn't skipping anything. Ikutsuki found me. I met Hikari and Akuma. Suddenly, people were paying for my meals and travel and private tutors, so I didn't even have to bother with school. Ikutsuki put me in the top-tier European circuit with the best cards and trainers money could buy. And I won there, too. Youngest duelist to win the European Championship in history. Still am. 15 years old. Nobody's broken that either.
...both of those nights ended the same way. But they couldn't have been more different for me. When I won the French Championship, I was both happy and sad. I had won, but I just kept thinking... "Why can't my mom and dad be here to see this? Why do they have to be gone? Why can't I share this with them?" That stuck with me and kept festering for two years. When I won the European Championship, and I saw people cheering for me...it felt completely hollow. I resented them all more than anything. I thought I wanted all of them to die.
Then I came here, with Hikari and Akuma. And I met Juudai. And...for the first time and definitely not the last, he saved my life. Just by being himself. I didn't want to kill anybody, I just. Wanted to feel like how I'd felt with my parents again. And. Bit by bit, I started to get that again. Hikari. Akuma. Juudai. Asuka. Jeanette. Tomoko. Sayuri. Suguru. Jinn. Desdemona. Niyo. Ruka. Rua. Yusei. Izayoi. Atlas. ....I even found out my dad was still alive. And I had him too. And, all of a sudden...there were all these people around me that I cared about and in this dangerous place, I didn't want to lose them. I wasn't trying to become stronger so I could become a Duel Champion. I wanted to protect the things I'd gained. I stopped being a pro.
...now I'm here again. And I'm closer than I've ever been to being a champion. Not just of my country, not just of my region, but of the entire world. And I'm filled with all of these...feelings I haven't felt in a long time.
Everything I am, I am 'cause of this game. And. I want to be the strongest duelist I can be because of that.
So I can push this game forward.
So I can protect all of the people who I've gotten close to.
So I can show people like me, whether they're psychics or connected to spirits or just. A normal person who's felt like they've never had anything and they're completely alone, they can find something for themselves.
So I can take the championship everywhere it'll let me go and shout at the top of my lungs that spirits and psychics are just like everybody else and they didn't destroy Heartland and they're not anybody's enemies.
So I can finally reach the dream I've held on to ever since I was a little girl.
So my dad can see me become a champion. Like he should've been able to when I was a teenager.
...Juudai has been there for me more times than I can count. He's my brother and my best friend and I love him more than I knew I was capable of caring about someone before I met him. He could've been a champion three times over if he'd wanted to. If he won, I knew he'd do great things as a champion.
[She shakes her head.]
But I'm the one that's gonna win.
I'm doing a lot of talking right now. Because this everything that's in my head and I want it out of my head and in this video, because tomorrow night, there isn't gonna be anymore talking. Just dueling. Just this game and nothing else.
Tomorrow night, I'm gonna win. And I'm gonna become champion. That's the bottom line.
[The recording stops there.]
...I started playing this game about twenty years ago. Six years old. My parents introduced it to me. I wasn't learning to read or write or do math or anything at the pace I should've been, but once I got my hands on these cards...I remember those things started making sense. I played the game all the time with my mom and dad.
[She's silent for a moment. She stares down at nothing.]
Then, they were gone.
And I didn't have anything...'cept a lot of anger and sadness that I couldn't handle, and this game. So I played this game every opportunity I could. I tried to get better as much as possible, because if I was focused on getting better, everything stopped hurting for a little while. Eventually, I got good enough that people started to notice. I could enter tournaments and win, even though I didn't have the best or the rarest card. I thought...maybe I can do better than just getting better. Maybe I can become the best. Maybe I can be like Yugi. Or Kaiba. Maybe I can be a champion.
I skipped meals. I skipped sleep. I skipped school. I rode on trains overnight all over my country to go to tournaments. And it worked. I won. I could get better cards. And I became the youngest duelist to win the French Championship in history. Still am. 13 years old, nobody's broken that yet, after more than ten years. Then, all of a sudden, I wasn't skipping anything. Ikutsuki found me. I met Hikari and Akuma. Suddenly, people were paying for my meals and travel and private tutors, so I didn't even have to bother with school. Ikutsuki put me in the top-tier European circuit with the best cards and trainers money could buy. And I won there, too. Youngest duelist to win the European Championship in history. Still am. 15 years old. Nobody's broken that either.
...both of those nights ended the same way. But they couldn't have been more different for me. When I won the French Championship, I was both happy and sad. I had won, but I just kept thinking... "Why can't my mom and dad be here to see this? Why do they have to be gone? Why can't I share this with them?" That stuck with me and kept festering for two years. When I won the European Championship, and I saw people cheering for me...it felt completely hollow. I resented them all more than anything. I thought I wanted all of them to die.
Then I came here, with Hikari and Akuma. And I met Juudai. And...for the first time and definitely not the last, he saved my life. Just by being himself. I didn't want to kill anybody, I just. Wanted to feel like how I'd felt with my parents again. And. Bit by bit, I started to get that again. Hikari. Akuma. Juudai. Asuka. Jeanette. Tomoko. Sayuri. Suguru. Jinn. Desdemona. Niyo. Ruka. Rua. Yusei. Izayoi. Atlas. ....I even found out my dad was still alive. And I had him too. And, all of a sudden...there were all these people around me that I cared about and in this dangerous place, I didn't want to lose them. I wasn't trying to become stronger so I could become a Duel Champion. I wanted to protect the things I'd gained. I stopped being a pro.
...now I'm here again. And I'm closer than I've ever been to being a champion. Not just of my country, not just of my region, but of the entire world. And I'm filled with all of these...feelings I haven't felt in a long time.
Everything I am, I am 'cause of this game. And. I want to be the strongest duelist I can be because of that.
So I can push this game forward.
So I can protect all of the people who I've gotten close to.
So I can show people like me, whether they're psychics or connected to spirits or just. A normal person who's felt like they've never had anything and they're completely alone, they can find something for themselves.
So I can take the championship everywhere it'll let me go and shout at the top of my lungs that spirits and psychics are just like everybody else and they didn't destroy Heartland and they're not anybody's enemies.
So I can finally reach the dream I've held on to ever since I was a little girl.
So my dad can see me become a champion. Like he should've been able to when I was a teenager.
...Juudai has been there for me more times than I can count. He's my brother and my best friend and I love him more than I knew I was capable of caring about someone before I met him. He could've been a champion three times over if he'd wanted to. If he won, I knew he'd do great things as a champion.
[She shakes her head.]
But I'm the one that's gonna win.
I'm doing a lot of talking right now. Because this everything that's in my head and I want it out of my head and in this video, because tomorrow night, there isn't gonna be anymore talking. Just dueling. Just this game and nothing else.
Tomorrow night, I'm gonna win. And I'm gonna become champion. That's the bottom line.
[The recording stops there.]